Laughter is the best medicine goes the old saw. That’s right, one that’s too dull to cut, but when you try to cut a board with it, it’s likely to slip off and cut you. I’m not sure if the howl I let out when I heard the news that President-elect Trump plans to nominate Matt Gaetz (R-FL) as U.S. Attorney General of the U.S., the top law enforcement officer of the nation, was a howl of laughter or howl of pain. My wife rushed into the kitchen where I was cooking dinner to see if I was okay. I’m not. It was laughter, but this laughter is painful and I don’t know if it’s going to make me better.
For the next four years, if I laugh at the antics of the clown car that Trump is installing, it will be a mixture of outrage and pain. Behind the shock, the insanity, the fundamental cruelty that underlies the story of the day, the actual results will be anything but funny for the people being maligned, prosecuted, rounded up to be detained or forced out of the country, going hungry, dying or being maimed for lack of necessary healthcare, losing their savings, losing their jobs, or any of the other possible harms we will face under an incompetent, malevolent federal leadership.
Take everything that follows as an attempt at the blackest humor (according to dictionary.com: a form of humor that regards human suffering as absurd rather than pitiable, or that considers human existence as ironic and pointless but somehow comic).
Congressman Gaetz is such an amazing pick for that job because, of course, he’s been accused of sex-trafficking of a 17 year old girl and illicit drug use, and was subject to a Congressional Ethics Investigation for that and for accepting possibly illegal gifts. The report was set to be released Friday, and may have resulted in his expulsion from Congress, so Trump’s lifeline announcement allowed him to safely resign from his seat before the possible consequences could be enforced. Hilarious! Trump really stuck it to the libs!
If only Jeffrey Epstein were still alive. He could have been pardoned and installed as special advisor to the President on women and children. Can you imagine the howls from the lame stream media on that? That would have been so awesome!
Speaking of awesome. How about Robert F. Kennedy for health czar? Finally someone who understands that the only thing better than being safe from deadly diseases is to experience those diseases for yourself and conquer them with your natural human vigor and strength instead of so-called lifesaving vaccines and medications. Think Darwin’s survival of the fittest. The problem with our modern world is that we allow too many weak individuals to survive. Disease should be given a fair shot at thinning the herd. In the words of one great thinker of the 20th century, “The state has the responsibility of declaring as unfit for reproductive purposes anyone who is obviously ill or genetically unsound ... and must carry through with this responsibility ruthlessly without respect to understanding or lack of understanding on the part of anyone”—Adolph Hitler, in “Mein Kampf,” 1925. See, he had a plan, kind of like the brilliant, forward thinking document “Project 2025.”
What are the qualities of a great leader? If you’re thinking integrity, competence, character, honesty, collaboration and such, you are SO OLD SCHOOL (speaking of which, who needs school when you have AI and who needs money when you have Crypto!).
A truly great leader must come across knowledgeable and suave on television. Central casting. Only the best looking (and the richest) qualify in the Trump administration because they are the ones most able to deliver the TRUTH to the American people. Oh, did I point out the meaning of truth? Yeah, words aren’t what they seem. As George Orwell points out in 1984, “War is peace. Freedom is slavery. Ignorance is strength….It's a beautiful thing, the destruction of words.” Such beautiful words to live by!
I could go on. And I will, some other day. Or maybe I won’t. Maybe I’ll build a bunker stocked for at least four years. Maybe I’d better make it 20, surely he won’t live longer than that.
Paul Epstein is a retired teacher and musician living in Charleston
published in the 11/16/24 weekend edition of the Charleston Gazette-Mail
So very sharp and to the quick.
ReplyDelete